Validation or My Heart is Breaking

There is the difference between being a bad coach, a good coach and a great coach. A good coach teaches the skills of the game. A great coach goes beyond that to motive, inspire and instill confidence, not just with the game but with being a human being. A bad coach fails to do either. I aspire to be a great coach.

I’ve mentioned the softball drama from this season and I’m still not 100% ready to give you the complete low down. You get the gist in about 100 words. I thought I was done with crying about it. I’ve coached for the last 7 seasons at MY high school. I love that school and I love these girls. I just cried again, but for a different reason. One of the varsity players just sent me this email:

I heard about your choice to leave, and after
everything that has happened this year, I don't blame
you. But I wanted to take the chance to thank you for
everything you've done for me over the past two years.
You taught me so much last year and really helped me
develop my skills and prepare me for the varsity
level. I also wanted to thank you for really pushing
to get me to play in the playoffs last year. I knew
you had a lot of confidence in me, and I wanted to do
my best for you and the other girls. Thanks to you I
was able to experience a STATE CHAMPIONSHIP, and I can
not thank you enough for that opportunity.
Although you were not my coach this year, you still
helped me as much as you could. I loved when you came
to our games or practices because I knew you would
have some sort of pointers for me. I'm a little upset
I won't be seeing you in the playoffs, because seeing
you at games like [rival team] gave me confidence.
Although you may be done coaching at [our school], I hope that
you continue to teach girls elsewhere. You have such a
love and understanding for the game that you try to
share with your players, and you definitely shared
with me. I hope to coach softball someday and I can
only hope to be as good a coach as you. I want to
inspire girls to always do their best and help them to
try and reach their full potential just as you did for
me. Thank you for everything you have done for me, and
I would appreciate if you could also thank [your husband] for
the help he gave me these past few weeks as well.
Again thank you both for everything.

I don’t need validation and haven't been seeking it, but it sure is rewarding. Unfortunately, it’s left me feeling even sadder. I stand behind my decision to walk away and I have received nothing but support. I just can’t stand by and be a part of something that goes against my principles. It wouldn’t be setting a good example for the girls. It’s just so hard to walk away when I know that I’m making a difference. I know that if I don’t make a stand right now, the school won’t be able to make the right long term decision and the madness will just continue. Sometimes doing the right thing is so damn hard. I never thought that receiving validation that I’m becoming a great coach would leave me feeling so...sad.

Comments

[Compassionate]

Dear Mommy...

Don't be sad. You've touched a life in a very signifigant way. I suspect you have touched many more lives than you will ever know.

Be proud that you made a difference, so few people take the time. Be even prouder that you are someones roll model.

Princess and BamBam are very lucky to have such a wonderful person as their mom.

[BusyDad]

When you lose everything else, your principles are all that define you. Don't lose them. You did the right thing and those who's opinions matter can see it, as shown here.